Strength for Sensitives

  • Waning Moon Detox Bath Ritual

    Woman in bath

    Clear your energy with an energy detoxing bath

    The moon is waning, which means it’s getting smaller. When the moon is getting smaller, you can do work on minimizing things, getting rid of things in your life.

    A lot of people talk about manifestation during the new moon. That’s fine and all, but the time leading up to the new moon is really, really powerful for letting go, cutting cords, and getting rid of things like thoughts, habits, ideas, relationships, things that are no longer serving you. This is something that you’ll want to work on between now and the New Moon.

    Letting go of what you don’t need makes space to bring new things into your world.

    If you’re doing big, heavy work in your life you’ll only want to focus on one thing per moon cycle. For example, if you’re going through a bad break-up or a friendship that needs to go or you’re kicking a bad habit, right now is the perfect time to work on that stuff. 

    You might only want to work on kicking that habit or getting rid of that influence or doing that toss-away work right now instead of working on building and growing and manifesting. There’s always time for that.

    Spiritual Detox Bath

    A salt bath is good once a month, or once a week, or whenever you are feeling overwhelmed by life. You can take a salt bath or go into saltwater to detox, if you’re lucky enough to live near the ocean. It really helps to clear out your energy; especially if you set the intention to clear out your aura while you’re running the bath, and also while you’re mindfully gathering supplies.

     

    Smudge Stick

    What you need:

    Sage smudge stick

    1/2 cup of sea salt – I use sea salts that I buy at the supermarket for like 99 cents. You can also get Himalayan Salt (but watch your carbon footprint, either way)

    Cedar Essential Oil – 5 drops – this is a great scent that helps to clear your aura

    Lavendar Essential Oil – 5 drops another scent that helps to clear your aura

    Black candles – to clear negative energy. I’d use a votive size, but you can use whatever size works for you.

    Black crystals, like obsidian, smokey quartz, and onyx can also help with the process. Place them on the edge of your bath, near your candles.

    Set an intention. You can think something like: “I’m not only going to take a salt bath, I’m going to make this a ritual for myself so that I can clear a lot of stagnant, stale, unneeded energy out of my aura, and cut cords and get rid of habits that aren’t serving me and use the energy of the moon to help me with this.”

    Create a sacred space. Creating a sacred space for yourself to use the power of the moon and the elements that you bring into your bathroom is a part of the process. Make sure that the space is clean, so that your energy is not distracted by thoughts of picking up clothes off the bathroom floor or having toy boats strewn around your candles. This is your time and you deserve a space that feels energetically pure.

    You should also take the time to smudge the room. Get into all of the corners, nooks, and crannies of your bathroom with the smoke from your smudge stick.

    If you can’t burn sage in your home, you can make a purifying spray out of rose quartz, salt, water, and sunshine.

    Don’t forget to smudge yourself, too! You can do this after you undress, before you get into the bath. Run the smudge stick from your head to your feet, up and down the sides of your body—including under your arms, and between your legs

    Call your angels, spirit guides and ancestors into the space. Ask your spirit guides to help you release what is no longer serving you and to carry it away with them.

    Run the water and add the oils and salt. I prefer a nice, steamy hot bath so that it works on a physical level as well.

    Inhale purity, exhale gunk. Breathwork is a really helpful add-on to this process. Your lungs can actually store a lot of old air deep down inside them. It’s a good practice to do deep breathing on a regular basis, and it certainly adds a level of clearing to this ritual.

    First, focus on your breathing. I usually breathe in for a slow count of six and out for a count of 8. Do this 3-4 times.

    Then start focusing on inhaling pure, opalescent white light or pure positive energy energy. Then imagine mucky, green or grey or black—whatever color you imagine your negativity being—rising from your spirit when you exhale. 

    Breathe in the white light really deep, as deep as you can. And then exhale all the junk and trash and bad thoughts and everything.

    Do this throughout the entire bath, if you can.

    Black candle with orchid

    Let your mind wander. Sometimes you’re going to make associations, you’re going to get these insights into what’s bothering you. Or, you’re going to get ideas about how to move forward in your life while you’re sitting in this relaxed state, focused on your breathing.

    You can also concentrate on letting go of stress, letting go of pressure, fear, the feeling of overwhelm, resistance, blockages; anything you are holding on to or any energy that stands in front of you, stopping you from moving forward.

    Think about unhealthy habits, unhealthy addictions, unhealthy relationships, unhealthy thought patterns, unhealthy perceptions, unhealthy emotions that you have. Imagine them being incased in bubbles and floating away or seeping out of your body, into the water.

    Tune into your body. While you’re sitting there, working on releasing the negativity from your body, pay attention to which areas in your body you experience discomfort in and shine that glowing, crystalline energy in those places. 

    You want to make sure that you are filling your entire aura, your entire being with bright, calm, pure energy.

    Focus on the areas that are hurting and also imagine the toxins oozing out of your body, out of your light field, out of your energy system.

    Imagine yourself shedding dense layers of energy.  It’s like shedding or cutting off outer dried layers to reveal a glowing energy body underneath.

    Imagine glimmering, bright light with all of the colors of the rainbow shimmering at one time flowing through your system, pushing out anything that is lower-vibration or negative.

    Cut cords. I call Archangel Michael into my clearing meditation and I ask him to cut cords that are no longer serving me.

    You don’t have to worry about this with your children, your partner, friends or family because it’s not actually going to cut cords or dissolve your friendships and make you stand alone. What it will do is it will help you maintain your energetic connections in a positive way.

    Imagine a sword slowly sweeping over your body, cutting away the cords you don’t need, trimming back any that you want to maintain or that are good for you.

    Really take the time to imagine this and really get into the visualization of all of the different energy that’s draining you, that no longer serves you being swept or cut away from you. Imagine these cords or points of contact with you and your energy field being cut away or being trimmed back so you have more energy to yourself.

    Energetic bandaids. If you feel any energy wounds in your energetic field be sure to cover them up with an energy band-aid, which is like a glowing patch of energy that you place over any energetic wounds you feel.

    I have to do that, personally, in my lower back area. It’s one of my chronic energetic wound areas.

    If you feel that your throat chakra is hurting, then put your energy bandaid on the front and back of your neck. If your sacral chakra is hurting—a lot of us get this lower back pain—then you would want to put it on the back and the front of your body.

    Stay in the bathtub as long as you desire to and you can repeat these rituals; the deep breathing, sloughing off the energy, even take a loofa and slough off the dead skin off your body so you have the physical representation of releasing the dead things; the things that are no longer serving you, the things that you don’t need to carry around any longer.

    Stay in the bath as you drain the water. One of the most powerful parts of the process is staying in the bath while the water is draining out. You might actually feel things pulling off your energy body and being sucked down the drain.

    While you’re doing this, set the intention for all the negativity, poor habits, connections that you don’t need, energetic attachments that are unnecessary for you to be cleared from your energy body. Imagine them going down the drain with the water.

    Rinse yourself. This will help to wash away anything that was ‘stuck’ to you.

    Let yourself air dry. Even though you should be pretty squeak clean, you don’t want the water from the bath pushed back into your skin; you want to let it air dry or evaporate into the air so that it’s not staying in your energy field or your energy body.

    Don’t forget to open a window after your bath or keep a window open during your bath if it’s not too cold outside. That way, when you’re burning sage or any kind of clearing incense, it has a way out of your house. 

    Sage yourself again. After you air dry, you can sage yourself once more to seal in your energetic purity.

    Thank your angels, spirit guides, and ancestors for their help.

    Journal. If you feel called to journal after your bath, that’s also a really good thing to do. You might have a surge of new ideas, new thoughts, new connections you made in the bath.

    Would you like to do a Cord Cutting and Energy Retrieval meditation to take this to the next level? Get my Cord Cutting and Energy Retrieval Ceremony.


    CORD CUTTING AND ENERGY RETRIEVAL CEREMONY

  • Don’t Freak Out About A Bad Review

     

    What should you do when you get a bad review?

    I see time and time again – people like you and me who are doing readings and putting their hearts and souls into their work – feeling down in the dumps about a bad review or negative feedback.

    Don’t worry, Sensitive Spiritual Entrepreneur! Bad reviews come with the territory.

    You have to learn to use some of the negative feedback you get to up your game – and also to fully appreciate the fact that you won’t please or connect well with everyone. Some of the clients even lie about their situations and then get mad at us for pointing out that we see the truth!

    What can you learn from a negative review?

    Now, don’t think I am saying to ignore scores of bad reviews! If you are getting more bad reviews than good reviews, check your work. Are you giving your clients 100% of your attention or are you multitasking or having more than one conversation at a time? Are your kids making a lot of noise in the background? Is your connection clear and crisp, or do you need a new headset and microphone to chat on? Is your computer fast enough? Do you need to polish your psychic, communication, or typing skills? Are you staying logged in through the night, groggily answering chat requests when they wake you from a deep slumber? How’s your attitude?

    If bad reviews aren’t a common thing for you, then your bad review or feedback might be due to one of the following things:

    You don’t say what the client wants to hear

    Many of our clients are lovesick souls who call in or chat with a tarot reader or psychic hoping to hear that the ex WILL come back or the married lover will leave the spouse. When the cards or Spirits say something different, the client gets mad (not at you, but at the Universe) and either leaves a bad review or clicks on that one-star review.

    Learn to let these bad reviews roll off you. It’s not about you or your reading. It’s about something the client likely needs to know but doesn’t want to face.

    Sadly, these people will usually visit as many psychics or tarot readers as it takes to find one to say what they want to hear. And then they’ll expect a refund when the ex doesn’t come back. Go figure.

    You don’t connect with the person

    No matter how in tune you are with your Spirit Guides or how you’ve mastered the cards, you are going to come across a client from time to time who you just don’t jive with. Everything you say will be met with either a negative response, silence or “that isn’t a message for me.”

    When this happens, it’s OK to tell the person that you just aren’t connecting with him or her and to either offer a refund or give a referral to someone who might be better able to connect with the person – or both. (You might even want to take a moment to meditate, cleanse your deck, or take the afternoon off if you’ve been pushing yourself.)

    You won’t connect with everyone. It is important, however, IMHO, to tell the client that you don’t feel that you are connecting and offer an alternative.

    In these situations, you will often cringe while you wait for a bad review. Some people are nice enough to just move forward without dinging your reputation. Others leave a bad review.

    You won’t connect with everyone you read for, and everyone you read for won’t be ready to hear what you have to say. That’s OK. Just refund their money, bless them, send them on their way—and DON’T take another appointment with them!

    You don’t offer what the person is looking for

    A client might reach out to a tarot reader when looking for a medium to connect with someone who has passed on or talk with an angelic healer when hoping for a shamanic experience. Some want medical advice or even Power Ball numbers!

    These mistakes in direction happen simply because the general public doesn’t understand the distinctions between psychics, tarot readers, healers, and other modalities and what specific people can and can’t do.

    When confronted with this issue, it might take a bit of time to figure out what the client really needs or is looking for – or it might be obvious right away. I’d recommend letting the client know what your services cover and don’t cover, offering a refund, and referring the client to someone who specializes in the service he or she is looking for.

    I also joke that I wouldn’t be doing readings if I had the lotto numbers! I’d be winning multiple millions often and using that money to better society (and myself, honestly)!

    Again, one would hope a client wouldn’t leave a bad review for a misunderstanding of services provided. Some will, though. And you have to learn to shake it off!

    The client is lying

    There are times when you will get a client who isn’t being wholly truthful about the question he or she is asking about. Some clients will flat-out lie about their situations.

    When your Spirit Guides, your cards, or your deep listening skills pick up the contradictions, the client might exit stage left (and leave a bad review on his way out) or get kind of miffed that you figured them out and leave a single star for your review.

    It always cracks me up in a way when people try to pull one over on their readers, because – well, many of us kind of just see or feel the dishonesty. That’s what we do. It’s the basis of our work.

    If a person values the money he is putting into a reading and the advice being given, it would be wise to be totally honest so that the reader can properly advise. After all, we aren’t trying to judge our clients about their lives, but to help them!

    Unscrupulous competitors and trolls

    Last, but certainly not least, are the bad reviews left by unscrupulous competitors and/or trolls. Some readers contact new readers on the sites they work on, get a reading, and leave a poor review.

    Most websites frown on this type of behavior and threaten termination in their T&Cs. Unfortunately, though, it might cost a new reader clients and money before the perpetrator is discovered.

    Other times, people with far too much time and money on their hands will troll readers, getting readings about fake topics and leaving bad reviews.

    If you think that you are being catfished and dinged by someone who works on the same site as you or a troll, make sure that you document reading times, dates, subjects, and reviews. And don’t be afraid to contact your rep to alert them to the issue.

    Ultimately, I use bad reviews as an opportunity to grow. I know that there are some people who just won’t be pleased with me, the messages I have for them, or the extent of the services I offer. I fully expect to get a bad review from time to time and I don’t let them affect my confidence in my skills or my overall feelings about the work I do.

    What do you think? Have you let a bad review get to you or do you use them for learning opportunities?

    Feel free to comment below!

     

  • The Reality of Saying NO

    RealityofNO

     

    What will happen if I say, NO!?

    I want to talk to you today about the reality of saying NO. If you are anything like me, you are thinking, “BWAH! Saying NO is better in theory than it is in practice!”

    Despite the fact that saying NO can help you to draw your proverbial lines in the sand and create necessary borders, it. is. hard. to. do.

    You know that – you’re a Sensitive Soul.

    When you say NO when you mean NO, there is usually kick-back. People who you had been bending over backward to please don’t get their satisfaction. Their mouths gape open and they look at you like you’ve gone insane.

    Didyousaynotome

    Or they shun you. Or they leave. Or they punish you for standing your ground.

    You see, we’ve been taught never to take no for an answer. We’ve been taught, “if at first you don’t succeed, try again.”

    And that makes it doubly difficult to stand behind saying no to something that you don’t want to do.

    For example, I will be very honest and say that I do NOT like teaching kids English in groups. I’ve worked in a middle school setting and I’ve worked with a small group of 2nd graders before – and I hated it. I dreaded going into work. I wanted to cry before the group sessions. Fifteen-year-olds cursed me out in class. I couldn’t keep the second graders under control – they were doing somersaults and cartwheels in class – even the kid I put in the corner ended up with a garbage can on his head, banging it against the wall… LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME! It was horrible.

    When the time came to renew my contracts – as you can imagine – I said NO.

    I said no to the moms who asked me to teach groups with their kids in them.

    But no one will take my no for an answer.

    They try to get some angle that will get me back into the classroom, back into my own personal version of hell – and I ain’t gonna have it!

    And they are angry.

    So, the result of my standing in my authentic desire is to be pushed a little outside of the social circle by the moms who want me to teach their kids. It sucks.

    When a Sensitive Soul says NO, s/he faces that “Damned if you do, damned if you don’t” type of situation.

    But a Sensitive Soul, just like anyone else – maybe even MORE than anyone else – needs to learn to do it.

    Saying NO might not feel comfy or keep people in your life, but it is necessary for you AND it lets you know who the right people in your life are (those who will still love you after you’ve said no to them).

    Here’s to the NOs in your life! I hope they come easily – or that you learn to accept the aftermath like I have. (mostly)
    Sue Ellis-Saller

  • Want a FREE Tarot Reading?

    Looking for a free tarot reading?

    Ahhh… The call of the free tarot reading. When someone advertises “freebies,” they generally get a line going around the block.

    I used to LOVE having reading parties! The energy was fantastic and I had a lot of fun…

    But free readings can be draining for a reader. They take time, energy, and resources.

    And then figuring out that I was reading for 30 or 40 or a hundred people who had no intention of actually buying a reading got frustrating. I’d see the same names over and over again on my free reading threads, but never once would many of those same people pay for a reading – even when I would run a “Pay What You Can” offer.

    That made me feel so unvalued and just plain old used, to tell you the truth.

    So, after more than a year of running an online tarot, oracle, and angel card reading business, and after having given away literally hundreds of free readings, I have decided to make some rules for my “free readings.” You’ll want to pay attention to these for future reference!

    1) Each person can only have ONE free reading per year – unless they win a contest or send 3 referrals to me.

    Free readings are meant to be a sample of my work so that a person can see if they appreciate my style – they are not meant to be our only means of interacting with one another! I do notice the same people requesting free readings over and over again – so obviously they like what I have to say, but they just might not value my time or understand about energetic exchanges. Because of this, I need to create boundaries.

    Free tarot readings are also meant to be a form of appreciation or a thank you from me! Those people who purchase a reading from me will be added to a special pool that will get insider access and notification of when I am running freebie offers.

    Also, those clients who refer 3 people to me who buy readings will get a free reading!

    2) Those who don’t give feedback for free angel and oracle card readings will be put on my No Thank You list.

    I really have a problem with those who can’t even say,”Thank you for taking the time to read for me.” Honestly. We all know it is quite rude. Please don’t even put your name down if you can’t bother to say thanks!

    3) Please do not contact me behind the scenes to ask me for a free reading. The answer will be no.

    **Reiki and energy healing are totally different things to me, and I will gladly pray for or send a bit of energy to you, your friend, or your family member regardless of their ability to pay.

    4) I am going to start bringing the free readings on my Facebook page. I may run a contest on Facebook or have a Twitter chat from time to time, but the majority of my “free reading” offers will be on this website.

    5) My direct mails will give details about free reading times and venues in the future. That means that, if you want to know when I’ll be practicing working with a new deck or where to sign up, you’ll probably want to sign up for my newsletter.

    Honestly, I LOVE doing readings and I love working with people. This is the job I have chosen (or that has chosen me), and I want to do well with it. I am a real person who puts her heart and soul (and time and energy) into readings, and I won’t just give myself away for free any longer.

    I am totally happy, though, to show my appreciation and gratitude for those who truly support me by giving them privileged access to my reading parties and learning sessions. Those who support my work by actually purchasing readings and referring new clients will get better access to free offers.’

    If you’d like to purchase a reading from me, click here for the details.

    If you are just looking for a free tarot reading, there are so many different websites to go to. Here are a few of my personal faves:

    Free Online Tarot Reading

    Facade.com

    Colette Baron-Reid

     

  • My Boundaries, My Responsibility

     

    defineboundaries

    Hold. The. Phone.

    This concept is HUGE!

    You have to define your boundaries for others to know what they are. HOLY COW!

    See, many of us Sensitive Souls have been walking around with our giving natures and generous hearts and not-at-all-well-defined boundaries… and then WE get frustrated from all of the taking that we allowed and often encouraged in the first place. We think that others are quite aware of boundaries because WE are subconsciously super-aware of them.

    Hmmmm…

    (I do this myself, so no judgment from me! I am just sharing my epiphany from this morning with y’all!)

    The people who we  interact with see our souls – they see that we are generous, that we were kind, and that we care for others. And they like that. They like the fact that we are generous – and that we are so quick to share with them. It’s part of their attraction to us.

    And we like the fact that we are generous and giving as well. Totally. We see it as a positive characteristic – well, I know I do… up to a point, that is!

    Where the issue arises  is often where the fence should have been posted – or 50 miles after that! You see, many Sensitive Souls say YES when they mean NO. We give in order to stop another person from hurting – even when we are aware that our generosity will hurt us. We have boundary issues.  Major boundary issues.

    And we need to learn to say NO! and honor our own needs, instead of getting frustrated when we are just so tired of giving to the same people over and over again. We need to create and enforce boundaries that protect us from others – and from ourselves!

    We also need to be prepared to allow relationships to evolve – or even fall away – as we learn to honor and implement our boundaries.

    I know that is one of the reasons we hesitate to create firm boundaries to begin with – because we fear losing the people we care the most for – BUT we have to be willing to allow ourselves to see our relationships as they are – how they serve others and how they serve us. Our needs have to be a part of the equation, too.

    And in order to make sure that our own obligations and desires are honored, we Sensitive Souls have to establish firm boundaries.

    And it’s HARD!! Oh dear Lord, is it hard!

    But it is necessary. And it does get easier with practice.

    Despite what we might think/hope/pray, other people just aren’t going to know where our pleasure stops and our pain begins until we tell them. We have to be willing to let them know our limitations so that they can 1) understand that we HAVE boundaries to begin with and 2) heed them. If they don’t know where our boundaries lie, of course they will step all over them. It’s our responsibility to point them out.

    We can’t deny all of our rights and even our needs in order to please others. It just doesn’t work. Well, let’s say it might work for others, but it certainly doesn’t work for us.